Drunken Omelette


We apologize, but you’re all just too weird.


We posted this photo of Human Failure Chris Rix for all of you who found us while searching for photos of shirtless quarterbacks. Yes, because we hate you.

Sorry for the sudden AWOL again, but recovery from the (repeated) night of the storms has taken longer than we expected.

We would like to give a little bit of hollah back to Roll Bama Roll, which gave us linkage that greatly enhanced our sight hittage — even well beyond Keyshawn scarf levels. Gentlemen, what you have done for this half-assed sports blog is so important that we will not even question for one nanosecond why you’re having a kind of creepy competition to judge which celebrichick is hotter*.

As for the rest of you non-Alabama fans who read said half-assed sports blog, we think you have some real problems surprisingly not related to reading this half-assed sports blog.

You see, we’ve been scanning over the search items that link people to this site and unfortunately we’ve left the halcyon wholesome days of Keyshawn and his aforementioned goofy desert scarf.

Here’s a few of the reasons why we feel like we need to spray off with a hose:

“Kyle Boller ex-girlfriend”: We’ve long been of the opinion that God hates Kyle Boller, and maybe that’s why you ended up clicking here. (more…)



EVENIN’ SCRAMBLE: Failed head coach finds job, and you may have made Jesus sad.


Cam Cameron owed the Ravens 1.

Norv Turner Jr. has a job.
Former Dolphins and Indiana coach Cam Cameron is headed to Baltimore to be new coach John Harbaugh’s offensive coordinator, according to ESPN.com. Cameron had previously been a candidate for every third offensive coordinator job in pro ball, college and Lega Nazionale Football Americano Italiano.

He will try to resuscitate an offense that, despite having a stout running game, a fantastic tight end and a decent batch of receivers, swallowed Draino and lit itself on fire on third down last year. (more…)