Drunken Omelette


DAYS OF THE ROUNDBALL: Five (or so) commercials that will drive us to psychotic rage by tourney’s end.


You are not hip. You are dead.

We like watching college basketball in overloaded, screen-crossing championship tournament form. We do not, however, like the flood of adcrap that seems to fill each of the 40-something breaks per game.

If we commit murder in the next two and a half weeks, one of these commercials will likely be the source of it.

1. KFC’s attempts to rebrand itself as kewl people food.
After appealing to the heartland, then realizing the heartland has no money because of a murderous economic downturn, KFC is now appealing to the well-money 18-34 market and the uber-self-conscious middle-aged yuppie they will one day become.

In recent days, we’ve chatted about the first(circa 1991?) Hot Wings ads, which offered the unlikely premise of two baseball players gradually working their way through a bucket of Hot Wings while busting out home runs at an empty sandlot. We don’t know why we think two young black men using a mouth of dry fire as a relaxing motivator for sharpening their batting skills is so school, but we do.

But an ad with some ditsy chick deciding to date someone because Hot Wings can be sauceless is made only for killing. Obviously this girl has never eaten at variety of down home Southern restaurants or at Hooter’s — even when she worked there, maybe. (more…)